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Hullo! I'm Andrew. I'm a fan of all things pop culture, and a contributor to A Bright Wall in a Dark Room (which, statistically, is why you're here). This is how I fill my time these days. Thanks for visiting. All the BWDR pieces I've written are here.
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#21. The Bourne Legacy
Directed by: Tony GilroyWritten by: Tony Gilroy & Dan Gilroy (The Gilroy Brothers!), based on the “Bourne” series of novels by Robert LudlumShot by: Robert ElswittStarring: Jeremy Renner, Rachel Weisz, Edward Norton, Oscar Isaac, Stacey Keach, Scott Glenn, and many incidental performances.Edward Norton’s Hair: Has gone SUPER SAIYAN!I Don’t Get It: Is Jeremy Renner Jason Bourne’s little brother?Edward Norton’s Management Style: Will earn him a lot of enmity, long-term.Oscar Isaac: Sucker Punch was unforgivable, but he’s not bad in this. Y’know, subtle and junk.Super Hearing: One of Jeremy Renner’s powers.Jeremy Renner Faces His Deadliest Foe: Chemical dependency.Also: WOLVES! He fights wolves in this.But: The Grey did wolf fights better.Hmm: Maybe it’s not a good sign that all I’m thinking of is different movies while watching this.Who: Is this guy shooting up the lab? Did I miss something? What is happening?Honestly: I have no idea what is going on.Did I Fall Asleep?: Who are these people trying to kill Rachel Weisz? And where did she get this giant house from?WOW: Did J-Ren really just climb that house, or was that a special effect? How did the camera follow him in through the window? If it was on a crane, it would have looked like a giraffe peeking into a house.I Am So Bored: By all this medical mumbo jumbo.The Most Banal Dialogue Ever Uttered In A Bourne Movie: “Hey, how do I get this up on the big screen?” “I don’t know.”What Does: “Viral him out” mean? Ugh, never mind I don’t even care. Who: Is this guy that’s chasing them now?I’ve Never Once: In my life seen a police motorcycle. Where are all these motorcycles coming from?Come On: You can’t just ignore that the central character has been shot.Second Movie In A Row: In which Jeremy Renner gets all woozy all of a sudden.Ok, So…: They get away from motorcycle man, and that’s the end?Conclusion: Actiony, but almost entirely non-sensical. 

#21. The Bourne Legacy

Directed by: Tony Gilroy
Written by: Tony Gilroy & Dan Gilroy (The Gilroy Brothers!), based on the “Bourne” series of novels by Robert Ludlum
Shot by: Robert Elswitt
Starring: Jeremy Renner, Rachel Weisz, Edward Norton, Oscar Isaac, Stacey Keach, Scott Glenn, and many incidental performances.
Edward Norton’s Hair: Has gone SUPER SAIYAN!
I Don’t Get It: Is Jeremy Renner Jason Bourne’s little brother?
Edward Norton’s Management Style: Will earn him a lot of enmity, long-term.
Oscar Isaac: Sucker Punch was unforgivable, but he’s not bad in this. Y’know, subtle and junk.
Super Hearing: One of Jeremy Renner’s powers.
Jeremy Renner Faces His Deadliest Foe: Chemical dependency.
Also: WOLVES! He fights wolves in this.
But: The Grey did wolf fights better.
Hmm: Maybe it’s not a good sign that all I’m thinking of is different movies while watching this.
Who: Is this guy shooting up the lab? Did I miss something? What is happening?
Honestly: I have no idea what is going on.
Did I Fall Asleep?: Who are these people trying to kill Rachel Weisz? And where did she get this giant house from?
WOW: Did J-Ren really just climb that house, or was that a special effect? How did the camera follow him in through the window? If it was on a crane, it would have looked like a giraffe peeking into a house.
I Am So Bored: By all this medical mumbo jumbo.
The Most Banal Dialogue Ever Uttered In A Bourne Movie: “Hey, how do I get this up on the big screen?” “I don’t know.”
What Does: “Viral him out” mean? Ugh, never mind I don’t even care. 
Who: Is this guy that’s chasing them now?
I’ve Never Once: In my life seen a police motorcycle. Where are all these motorcycles coming from?
Come On: You can’t just ignore that the central character has been shot.
Second Movie In A Row: In which Jeremy Renner gets all woozy all of a sudden.
Ok, So…: They get away from motorcycle man, and that’s the end?
Conclusion: Actiony, but almost entirely non-sensical. 

Notes

  1. seasonsofchange reblogged this from hidingundertrees
  2. seasonsofchange said: yes, thank you! finally someone who doesn’t think this was one of the best movies of last year!
  3. burbanked said: ACTIONY.
  4. sotheresthat said: I think maybe you fell asleep for a bit. It makes more sense than that. I typed out explanations then realized I sounded like a douchebag. I kind of liked it though.
  5. hidingundertrees posted this

12:01 pm, by hidingundertrees,